She is a good coworker, meaning she knows her duties and has ample experience.
She is also a gossip and a person that will rant when somebody doesn’t greet her the way she believes she deserves to be greeted, or about how a coworker or manager wasn’t friendly to her. It’s both what she says and how she says it, like she was hurt.
I still don’t know if what she wants is that everyone stops doing their jobs when she enters the workplace to give her attention, because otherwise, apparently, people hate her. She is also very pretty. Not that I’d want a relationship with her, because this trait is very off putting.
I’ve already heard her saying I’m not friendly and I don’t know who should I react. I think it’s ridiculous to start giving her attention to keep the peace because I have things to do that pay my bills and it would be very draining, I cannot fake interest in things that bore me. I don’t understand why we can’t just do our jobs and go home.
My mother is like this. She will never be happy and is addicted to being a victim. My mother actually pulled the victim card during Covid because her work was paying her to not work but she had to call every morning in case they needed her. She said it was worse having to call in the morning rather than work so was basically a victim because she got free paid time off while lots of people had lost all of their income.
Nothing you do will make this woman happy. Don’t try and be more friendly to her because it doesn’t matter. Better to act disinterested in everything she says and don’t answer personal questions she can twist and gossip about to other people.
Just by the way you describe them, it sounds like they’re more of a narcissist and want to be the center of attention rather than thin-skinned. Best way is to just ignore. Obviously don’t avoid them if it’s work related, but stop as soon as it’s no longer about work.
Easy.
Challenge them to trial by combat.
If they’re so thin skinned, you’ll easily win with your superior, thicker skin.
To be clear, I think her reaction to not getting attention is incredibly childish and immature.
That being said…I used to never greet anyone when I arrived at work. Just sat down and did my job. But one day someone told me that in their culture, it was incredibly rude not to greet people when you walk in the room. I had honestly never even thought about it that way and it never even crossed my mind that people may view things differently like this. Since I pride myself in being kind and polite to others, I made a small change in how I interact. When I arrive at work, I say a simple “hey” to people as I see them. I don’t make it into a full blown conversation or anything, but it just acknowledges their existence. I’m not offended when people don’t say hello to me, but it also doesn’t bother me or take any effort on my part to briefly acknowledge people when I arrive for the day.
As an autistic person I’ve got it in my database of human culture that it’s rude not to acknowledge a person’s presence. Not an aspect of any particular area’s culture, but just an aspect of human culture. People don’t like being treated as if they aren’t there.
Please read “21 Days to Resilience” by Montminy.
And once you understand it, then consider getting your co-worker to read it: you can’t convince 'em if you haven’t its meanings in you, to begin with.
_ /\ _
“It’s not friendly to go up to people and tell them that they’re not friendly. If you want to get along with people here a little better, maybe rethink certain parts of your approach.”
Or just leave it.
